Day Two

I am up early. 5:45 a.m. on a  Saturday. The bad thing about being up so early? It gives me more hours in the day to eat. Yesterday, I did okay. I wasn't planning on eating at all. I ended up eating tuna salad and celerey, and a piece of cheesecake. My husband's (We will call him A) mom sent home left over cheesecake with us. I could feel my self getting excited at the thought of something decedent being in our house, that I could sneak and induldge. I started eating at the corners of it, with no one watching. Contrary to my normal behavior (take it home, wait till A falls asleep, and bam! magically the cheesecake and anything eles that gets in my way is gone!), I told A, "I don't want this," and he said "I don't eaither." "Lets drop it off at my sister's." So we did, and that was that! It is freeing to let go of food! i am so terrfied of all the obsticals I know are coming, situations that will look just like that one. Will I be strong enough then? Of course it was easy, it is only day 1. What about day 3? I continually work myself up. I have an appointment for my evaluation at COPE on March 1. My first thought? I will be weighed. Uh oh. I havn't weighed myself since my last doctors appointment on Feb 1st....118... If it is anything more than that I will be devestated. Which sets me up being a basket case until March 1st. I have sat on my big butt and done nothing but felt sorry for myself the last two days. So I am hoping to be more productive this weekend. I am going to a pampered chef party with a friend this morning....I am sure there will be food there....Good luck Elise!